yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
