i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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