on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
