I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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