Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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