when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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