Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I need to stop coming to work sober
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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