Just mADE A PArabola og urine
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
