hotel room ftw
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Randomize
