how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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