And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Your face is a jimmy john
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
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