AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
These tits shall not be calmed
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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