Your tits are I can't wait for
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
