Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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