i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Are we still banned from the library?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize