the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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