Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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