found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
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Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
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My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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