we have pet lesbian snakes
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
