White coat. Heels.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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