hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize