Fuck appropriateness.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
