I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
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