I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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