Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
