I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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