she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
