I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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