have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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