Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
So vagazzling was a success
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize