"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
