Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Houston, we have a blender
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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