It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
COCAINE IS GR8
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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