remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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