Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
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