Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
