when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
