? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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