what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
