Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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