i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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