HIV tests are more positive than that guy
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
