I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I think my fart just growled at me.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
