Have you finally orgasmed yet?
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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