Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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