Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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