It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize