Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
They took my balls.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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