Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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