Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
